From Interviews to Jail!

Well, I spent the day helping to interview potential math teachers.  Each candidate was fantastic.  I am delighted by the caliber of candidates applying.  They are well rounded, passionate, intelligent, and prepared.  There was a day when I didn't see as many quite high quality candidates.  Each one seemed to have a passion for teaching, a desire to make a positive difference in children's lives, and a willingness to go that extra mile which is integral to a teacher's success with his or her students.  It was fun to see how they reacted as we, the interviewers loosened up and laughed with them.  Most seemed to feel comfortable with us.  I find that you find a lot more out about the candidate when they don't realize they are "on stage".  Their true personalities seem to peek through the formality. I know the success of a candidate is only about 50/50 based on an interview.  Some poeple are just really great at interviews, and their classroom demeanor doesn't match up.  But sometimes, the interview is just the tip of the iceberg, and the teacher offers so much more when they have their own classroom of 6th, 7th, or 8th graders.  If these people are half as good as their interviews, it's going to be an amazing year!

Afterward, I decided to deliver my Mary Kay books to some people in the neighborhood.  I placed some fabulous new stickers on the books, and took them around housing development in the area that looked like they could afford to buy Mary Kay.  I placed each book in its own mailbox and patted myself on the back for being proactive.  As I was crowing about my latest creative idea to Jules, she said in the kindest way possible, "Oh, you could get in trouble for putting things in mailboxes.  That's illegal!" 

EEK!!  Illegal?!  Now, I have got to be the biggest rule follower there is (unless breaking a minor rule will somehow help my students learn something or increase their morale), so this revelation had me quite concerned.  After discussing the latest effect of Julie's new health regiment - see her blog Notes to Self for more details, I hung up the phone and went out to mow the grass.

While mowing, I concocted a reconnaissance mission to retrieve my Look Books from the mailboxes.  I decided I would drive back to the neighborhood after mowing and pull the books that hadn't already been taken in by the mailbox owners.  Then I would speed away and the postal Nazi's would never know I had invaded their mailboxes.  This idea began to take shape and I mulled over waiting until dark.  Would this be a better idea as few people would be able to spot my peculiar behavior?  I then thought about the screeching belt I have in my engine right now and that the headlights might create more concern at night than at dusk, so I opted for the first plan.

To be sure that placing stuff with no stamp on it was illegal I double checked on the Internet.  OMG -- never have I seen so many warnings.  I think people who rob banks get off with a lighter sentence if they are caught.  One guy had the postal worker and two cops show up at his door.  Since my name, address, phone number, and Mary Kay website are all plastered on each Look Book, I determined my best course of action was to carry out this mission.  So I hopped in the car after dusting all the grass from the mower from my shirt and jeans and headed out.

Two miles up the road I took a right into the Wester Estates.  I had never seen so many people outside in my life.  It's 90 degrees here people....We live in Kentucky...we aren't supposed to be used to this I thought as I slowly cased the neighborhood.  I casually waved to a couple of teenagers as I headed for the end of the cul-de-sac and tried to remember which mailboxes I had put the books into.  The first house...no book, they must have taken it inside (Yes!), next one...same thing.  Third house ... and there IT was sitting there for the mailman's eyes tomorrow morning. 

I could only imagine the mailman's reaction if he pulled up in the morning and saw this foreign object in HIS domain.  He would check to see if the owners had forgotten to put up their flag.  He would check for a stamp only to find my name and address on the booklet.  No stamp.  A look of anger would replace the puzzled look as he realized another one of his customers on his route DARED used the United States Post Office's Official Mailbox to attempt to sell Mary Kay.  I could see him tear out of the cul-de-sac as he dialed 911.

"911"
"Yes, this is Postal Master 2391, and I have a post office emergency!  A lady on my route is using the mailboxes ILLEGALY.  I want her arrested right now!"
"Yes, sir.  We will send two officers immediately!  Even though we only have four on duty, this crime deserves half the force!"

I could see them pulling into my driveway.  Panicked, I would check my garage to see if it was on fire or if my husband had returned from Minnesota.  They would knock on the door.  As I opened it, they would immediately pull their guns, tell me to turn around, walk backward toward the sound of their voices, kneel, and place my hands behind my back.  Being a rule follower, I would of course comply.  Then they would read me my Miranda Rights. 

When I ask why I am being arrested, my once friendly postman would icily reply, "You put flyers in Official United States Mailboxes.  You are going to jail!"

I nervously went to the next house and found another Look Book and snatched it out of the mailbox and drove on as quickly as possible.

All in all, I retrieved six books and think I handed out about 16.  I can only pray that the other 10 have made their way into the homes of the people who live in the Western Estates Housing Development. And if I missed any, I will be holed up inside with the blinds drawn tomorrow, especially when the postman delivers the mail!